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Est. 2001
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2 BECOME 1: THE SPICE GIRLS EAT CHICKEN

April 5, 2002


2 BECOME 1: THE SPICE GIRLS EAT CHICKEN

Johnny Loftus

If Burger King can feature something as scary as a Chicken Whopper, why can't McDonalds re- re-configure its own chicken into yet another curious shape? Well America, get ready to go nuts over Chicken Select Strips. McDonald's believes that the "larger portion size and zesty sauces" of its new product "will appeal to adult diners." And to ensure that these slices of processed poultry aren't just for juniors, the golden arches licensed "Wannabe" from 20th century demographic busters the Spice Girls to drive home their point. The advertisement is straightforward in its meaning. As Mel B tells you what you want what you really really want, a multiethnic gang of fresh-faced young adults dip, crunch, and grin their way through an allegedly exciting package of the decidedly boring-looking chicken strips. This tomfoolery plays out on an orange and red cartoon set that suggests the menthol green candy land of Newport Cigarettes' print ads, a place where large-mouthed singles horse around with the vigor and boundless energy unique to a smoker of menthols.

But let's get back to the chicken, chicken.

It's not surprising that the Spice Girls sold "Wannabe" to McDonald's. After all, what's one commodity to another? What is amusing are the numerous tie-ins between song and product that McDonald's and ad agency DDB failed to consider. First of all, there's the "zesty" nature of the sauce included with these new strips. Where's the tie-in? During their heyday, the Spice Girls were certainly zesty. Why not feature Scary Spice in the ad, stomping about in KISS boots while freaking the Fry Guys? Secondly, McDonald's has decided to give its adult diners four of these tasty new chicken items. Well, there are four remaining Spice Girls halfheartedly working on solo careers. Ring them up, mate! But remember, Easy V doesn't come for free. She's a real lady. Finally, there's the matter of the spicy dust that gives these birds their bite. What better chicks to chat up spicy strips than four sassy British birds with a propensity for knicker kissing? Come on, DDB! Slam your body down and wind it all around!

Commercial is as commercial does. "Wannabe" will do its best to sell McDonald's latest chicken vagary, and move on to the next product that really really wants it. But you've been warned. If you watch any television at all, be prepared to have Scary, Ginger, Baby, Posh, and Sporty periodically stuck in your gob for the next month or so.

A zigga zigga say ahhh.

JTL

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Comments

I love that the Spicers had to pay Aprilia (motorcycle company) $1.5 million for failing to honor their contract to promote some new Euro scooter. Seems they should have read their contracts before breaking up.

, Apr 5, 2002 3:41PM

The Spice Girls on one hand. . .the bald, bespeckled Jason Alexander on the other.Damn. Never realized fast-food chicken was such a battleground of fading celebrity.

, Apr 5, 2002 3:48PM

I think the worst fast food commercial currently running on TV is the Shak commercial for BK, the one where he gets out of his car and walks through 5 decades of BK style. Ugh.Somebody raise Dave Thomas from the afterlife and give me that old man smiling and lookin like a goof!My favorite fast food campaign of all time has to be Taco Hell's old "Run for the Boarder" series, which played for years. I always thought that that tag line seemed to conjure up more images of our absurd southern boarder policy than it did a trip to the late night drivethrough.

, Apr 8, 2002 12:27PM

to me, spicegirl music used alone to advertise macdonalds processed chicken is a perfect thing- but when, back in '93 maybe? george clinton resorting to hawk burgerking mini muffins by bastardizing 'one nation under a groove', and danced around in the ad himself, like a hurdy-gurdy monkey, now THAT was a sad and lamentable moment: BUT bootsy, on the other hand, singin and doin voiceover himself, though left unseen, celebrating domino's crazy bread; that was almost, like, synergistic.

, Apr 8, 2002 3:18PM

I think that it is cool that Mc D's is using the Spice Girls to sell their new chicken strips. In a way this may help bring the Spice Girls back much to people's dismay. But if you think about it Mc D's has used *NSYNC and Britney Spears to sell products so why not use the Spice Girls. It's not that bad of a markting Idea if you think about it.

, Apr 8, 2002 4:41PM

If I think about it, McDonald's sucks. So, better not think about it and just eat what they tell me.

, Apr 9, 2002 11:31AM

I actually ate the new McDonald's chicken strips the other day while I was on the road to Eastern Pennsylvania. They were terrible. Bland, with a texture something like cardboard. Arby's makes far better chicken strips.On a related note, on my return trip I had a Chicken Whopper. What exactly makes this grilled chicken sandwich a "Whopper"? Other than the large amount of fatty, gross, unchewable crap on the side of the chicken breast, it was pretty good.And for a final food review, the new BK Veggie sucks. Tastes like a soggy smoked ground carrot patty. Steer clear--this is no Bean Burger (BK's delicious U.K. vegetarian treat that tastes like Pizza Rolls).

, Apr 11, 2002 11:52AM

Geeze, sab, and I've been long cracked for eating fast food--I've had none of the above.

, Apr 12, 2002 8:05AM

You have to believe in luck ....
What else could explain the success of someone (x5) that you hate?

First you had five dogs taking room in the charts - then they split and we still have 5 dogs taking up space somewhere.

How sad :(

, Apr 8, 2003 7:43PM

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