When is it time for a band to give it up?

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ryanking
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Postby ryanking » Thu Apr 25, 2002 12:18 pm

What are the symptoms, man?

sab
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Postby sab » Thu Apr 25, 2002 1:25 pm

1. When the band's original drummer, who also happens to be the greatest ever, dies.

2. When the band actually says they are going to hang it up, does a tour billed as their last, and records a live album of said tour.

3. When the band does a "reunion" tour that they say is just one "last" chance to see them, all the while insisting that the band is not back together and not going to record/release any new material.

4. When the band collaborates on a Broadway musical of one of their old albums.

5. When the band plays yet another big tour, this right on the heels of the lead singer's tour (billed as "sings the music of..." said band) just the year before.


<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: jeffsab on 2002-04-25 13:29 ]</font>

Proptronics
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Postby Proptronics » Thu Apr 25, 2002 1:41 pm

Addendum:

When the lead singer of notorious 80's arena rock band suffers from an ailment that keeps him from performing and the aforementioned band proceeds to recruit a new singer who not only sounds like him, but is the spitting image of the singer also.

Well, spitting image minus the fact that Steve Perry had straight hair and this guy's is curly.

ryanking
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Postby ryanking » Fri Apr 26, 2002 8:17 am

...and the new singer of said 80s arena rock band has a name that semi-rhymes with the old singer's name in what may be an effort to further blur the true lead singer's identity in the hazy recollections of waste management employees everywhere.

Mixmaster Shecky
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Postby Mixmaster Shecky » Fri Apr 26, 2002 1:03 pm

When fast food chains, truck makers or collect calling services use your old hits for an ad.

When your cd's start selling in gas stations for $5.

When your music is included in any 'Best Of 80's Hits' cd's.

When Best Buy is stuck with about 11 million unsold head-bobbers with your band's likeness.

If your name is Rob Zombie.

When your band does the soundtrack for any videogame-based movie.

When E! does a special on you (ala "Behind The Music")

If you are tied in any way to promoting breakfast cereal.

Proptronics
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Postby Proptronics » Fri Apr 26, 2002 1:49 pm

When you sue a french perfume maker for copywright infringement because they have a new perfume titled metalica.

When you sue Napster.

When you do a tour with a symphony and bill it as a "classical take on all your favorites."

When MTV holds a contest with the winner getting to watch your band play in their backyard.

When you admit in interviews that you're not good enough to play material off of your early albums because it's too fast.

ryanking
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Postby ryanking » Fri Apr 26, 2002 3:01 pm

When it's like, down to you and your drummer. And you replaced the guy who freaked out on acid twenty years ago.

Stephen Macaulay
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Postby Stephen Macaulay » Sun Apr 28, 2002 6:53 pm

When the only venues you can play include the Soaring Eagle Casino in Mount Pleasant, Michigan, and various states' fairs.

ryanking
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Postby ryanking » Mon Apr 29, 2002 4:20 pm

When, as the sweat from your bald forehead clouds your eyes and obscures the candy-striped festival tent, and your fat, wrinkled fingers stumble across the fretboard without the assistance of, or need for, so much as a conscious thought, your mind drifts to the codpiece-swelling lust you feel for the 21-year old with the ruby lipstick you met before the show, who by chance is the younger niece of the townie that you boned each of the the last four years you played the Ionia Free Fair.

Stephen Macaulay
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Postby Stephen Macaulay » Tue Apr 30, 2002 7:45 am

When you no longer have codpiece-swelling lust for 21-year-olds with ruby lipstick.


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