The Worst Lyrics Of All Time

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worpswede
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The Worst Lyrics Of All Time

Postby worpswede » Thu May 10, 2007 5:18 pm

Q Magazine wrote:The worst lyrics of all time
Today BBC 6 Music are to announce the worst song lyric of all time. Surely Snap have to win with their immortal, "I'm as serious as cancer" line? Oasis ought to be ranked highly, too - in fact you could probably fill an entire Top 10 with Noel Gallagher howlers. How about this bit of doggerel from Don't Go Away, which features perhaps the laziest chorus ever written:

"So don't go away, say what you say
But say that you'll stay
Forever and a day."

Rubbish. Anyway, here's the shortlist...


1. ABC - That Was Then But This is Now
More sacrifices than an Aztec priest
Standing here straining at that leash
All fall down, can't complain, mustn't grumble
Help yourself to another piece of apple crumble

2. Snap - Rhythm is a Dancer
I'm as serious as cancer when I say rhythm is a dancer

3. Human League - The Lebanon
Before he leaves the camp he stops
He scans the world outside
And where there used to be some shops
Is where the snipers sometimes hide

4. Razorlight - Somewhere Else
And I met a girl
She asked me her name
I told her what it was

5. Duran Duran - Is There Something I Should Know?
And fiery demons all dance when you walk through that door
Don't say you're easy on me
You're about as easy as a nuclear war

6. Oasis - Champagne Supernova
Slowly walking down the hall
Faster than a cannonball
Where were you while we were getting high?

7. Des'ree - Life
I don't want to see a ghost
It's the sight that I fear most
I'd rather have a piece of toast
Watch the evening news

8. Black Sabbath - War Pigs
Generals gathered in their masses
Just like witches at black masses

9. Toto - Africa
The wild dogs cry out in the night
As they grow restless longing for some solitary company
I know that I must do what's right
Sure as Killimanjaro rises like Olympus over the Serengheti

10. U2 - Elevation
I've got no self-control
Been living like a mole now, going down
Excavation
High and high in the sky
You make me feel like I can fly, so high
Elevation

They're pretty high on themselves across the pond.
I say, there's plenty of shitty American lyrics that can easily top most of these entries.
I'm calling bullshit on "War Pigs" and I like that "Where were you while we were getting high" line on "Champagne."
Totally agree with that Duran Duran line. I remember thinking the exact same thing as a teenager when it came out.

I really like The Raconteurs, but for fucks sake, "Intimate Secratary" does have some of the worst lyrics ever. I was reminded of this when someone else posted them on Q:

"I've got a rabbit it likes to hop
I've got a girl and she likes to shop
This ringing in my ears won't stop
I've got a red Japanese tea-pot
I've got a pen but I lost the top"

Add yours

Sven Killer Robot Spacema
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Postby Sven Killer Robot Spacema » Thu May 10, 2007 5:35 pm

Heifer whines could be human cries
Closer comes the screaming knife
This beautiful creature must die
This beautiful creature must die
A death for no reason
And death for no reason is MURDER

And the flesh you so fancifully fry
Is not succulent, tasty or kind
It's death for no reason
And death for no reason is MURDER

And the calf that you carve with a smile
Is MURDER
And the turkey you festively slice
Is MURDER
Do you know how animals die ?


Kitchen aromas aren't very homely
It's not "comforting", cheery or kind
It's sizzling blood and the unholy stench
Of MURDER


It's not "natural", "normal" or kind
The flesh you so fancifully fry
The meat in your mouth
As you savour the flavour
Of MURDER


NO, NO, NO, IT'S MURDER
NO, NO, NO, IT'S MURDER
Oh ... and who hears when animals cry ?

worpswede
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Postby worpswede » Thu May 10, 2007 9:11 pm

Sven Killer Robot Spacema wrote:And death for no reason is MURDER

You did this on purpose.
But you're right: it's pretty awful.

steve-o
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Postby steve-o » Fri May 11, 2007 9:25 am

Yo VIP let's kick it

All right stop collaborate and listen
Ice is back with my brand new invention
Something grabs a hold of me tightly
Flow like a harpoon daily and nightly
Will it ever stop yo I don't know
Turn off the lights and I'll glow
To the extreme I rock a mic like a vandal
Light up a stage and wax a chump like a candle
Dance go rush to the speaker that booms
I'm killing your brain like a poisonous mushroom
Deadly when I play a dope melody
Anything less than the best is a felony
Love it or leave it you better gain weight
You better hit bull's eye the kid don't play
If there was a problem yo I'll solve it
Check out the hook while my DJ revolves it

steve-o
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Location: Seattle, WA

Postby steve-o » Fri May 11, 2007 9:26 am

Sven Killer Robot Spacema wrote:Heifer whines could be human cries
Closer comes the screaming knife
This beautiful creature must die
This beautiful creature must die
A death for no reason
And death for no reason is MURDER


Agreed. And the cow noises at the beginning are just ridiculous.

grounded5am
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Posts: 1979
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Postby grounded5am » Fri May 11, 2007 9:48 am

none of those begin to top the worst lyrics ever list. here's three that does though (sorry for the length):

"Give it to me, don't give it away
Don't think about what the others say
My skins getting clear, my hairs so bright
All you do is fuck me every day and night

You're my secret beauty routine
Na, na, na, na, what my body has seen
I am lookin' good and I'm feeling nice
Baby you're the best magazine advice

Gimme your hot white cum
Gimme your hot white cum
Gimme your hot white cum
Gimme your hot white cum

I'm gonna pull you back down between the sheets
Everything is fresher when the day is sweet
In the morning light when you're already on the phone

Face it, one of these days
Without you I'm just another Dorian Gray
It's the fountain of youth
It's the meaning of life
So hot, so sweet, so wet my appetite

Gimme your hot white cum
Gimme your hot white cum
Gimme your hot white cum
Gimme your hot white cum

Face it, one of these days
Without you I'm just another Dorian Gray
It's the fountain of youth
It's the meaning of life
Baby you're the best magazine advice

Gimme your hot white cum
Gimme your hot white cum
Gimme your hot white cum
Gimme your hot white cum
Gimme your hot white cum
Gimme your hot white cum
Gimme your hot white cum
Gimme your hot white cum
Your hot white cum"
----------------------------------------------------------------------
gay messiah

"He will then be reborn
From 1970's porn
Wearing tubesocks with style
And such an innocent smile

Better pray for your sins
Better pray for your sins
'Cuz the gay messiah's coming

He will fall from the stars
Studio 54
And appear on the sand
Of Fire Island's shore

Better pray for your sins
Better pray for your sins
'Cuz the gay messiah's coming

No it will not be me
Rufus the baptist I be
No I won't be the one
Baptized in cum

What will happen instead
Someone will demand my head
And then I will kneel down
And give it to them looking down

Better pray for your sins
Better pray for your sins
'Cuz the gay messiah's coming"

----------------------------------------------

favorite

Don't look sexy but it just feels right
Not too dirty and it's not too tight
Why I never threw it out, I'll never know exactly why

Keep it in the drawer beside my bed
It's faded pink now, but it used to be red
Starting to fray at the seams, but I know that you'll still love me
Like you did, like you did
Like before, like before
Like we will, like we will
Be doin' it once more

Oh baby know what your like?
You're like my favorite underwear
It just feels right, you know it
Oh baby know how you feel?
You feel like my favorite underwear
And I'm slipping you on again tonight

Leave you lyin' on the bedroom floor
I leave you hangin' on the bathroom door
Take you for granted, but I'll always know exactly where you are

Lost you once you were hard to find
Got you back you didn't live like mine
Thought we were falling apart but you make me feel so pretty
Like you did, like you did
Like before, like before
Like we will, like we will
Be doin' it once more

Oh baby know what your like?
You're like my favorite underwear
It just feels right, you know it
Oh baby know how you feel?
You feel like my favorite underwear
And I'm slipping you on again tonight
Slipping you on again tonight
Wrap me and roll me, hold me tight
Tear me apart and make me new
Like you always do

Oh baby know what your like?
You're like my favorite underwear
It just feels right, you know it

You feel you're like this is what I want
You feel, you feel

Oh baby know what your like?
You're like my favorite underwear
It just feels right, you know it

You feel you're like this is what I want
You feel, you feel

Slipping you on again tonight

BandyLou
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Postby BandyLou » Fri May 11, 2007 11:11 am

I've said it before, and I'll stand by it. You all have provided some very noble attempts, but the very worst lyrics ever written in the history of lyrics are "Pour Some Sugar On Me" by Def Leppard.

It's medically dangerous to hear or read all of the words in one sitting, so I'll just provide a sample:

"...You got the peaches, I got the cream
Sweet to taste, saccharine
'Cos I'm hot, so hot, sticky sweet
From my head, my head, to my feet..."

Look up the rest if you really want, just be careful.
The contest is now closed, thanks.

trainwreck2
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Postby trainwreck2 » Fri May 11, 2007 11:15 am

can you get worse in a hit song than this little ditty? (unless youre r kelly but he dont count)
I walk these streets, a loaded six string on my back
I play for keeps, 'cause I might not make it back
I been everywhere, still I'm standing tall
I've seen a million faces
And I've rocked them all
Last edited by trainwreck2 on Fri May 11, 2007 11:15 am, edited 1 time in total.

LionIndex
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Location: San Diego

Postby LionIndex » Fri May 11, 2007 11:15 am

LFO--"Summer Girls"
If you've successfully purged it from your memory I won't poison your brain here by copying the actual lyrics. Just trust me.

worpswede
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Postby worpswede » Fri May 11, 2007 11:16 am

steve-o wrote:Yo VIP let's kick it

Image


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