The Worst Lyrics Of All Time

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Dawg
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Postby Dawg » Fri May 11, 2007 11:36 am

Man, "Favorite" by Lix Phair is about as cringeworthy as it gets. Good call.

I was thinking (hoping?) that HWC was a joke, though. Am I wrong?

grounded5am
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Postby grounded5am » Fri May 11, 2007 12:48 pm

no. it's real and it was pulled off the wal mart versions of the cd. i still stand by my 3 choices. pour some sugar on me is shakespearian compared to h.w.c. and gay messiah. i think it's the liberal use of cum in those songs that edges it over pour some sugar on me.

Dawg
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Postby Dawg » Fri May 11, 2007 1:19 pm

No, I know "HWC" is a real song, but what I meant is that she meant it as a joke (again, I hope she did...)

grounded5am
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Postby grounded5am » Fri May 11, 2007 2:33 pm

considering it's liz phair i'd have to say it was a joke. at least i hope so. of course she might be the first person to write, record, and release a song that was totally porn soundtrack ready that was never in a porn. or was it?

Sven Killer Robot Spacema
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Postby Sven Killer Robot Spacema » Fri May 11, 2007 8:08 pm

"Stupid Bastard Girl" by Hurricane Dick

Stupid bastard! Stupid bastard! Stupid bastard girl!
You are such a stupid bastard! Got me in a whirl!
Take all my hard earned money! Spend it on cheap thrills.
You are such a stupid bastard. Stupid bastard girl!

(Fast Hurricane force guitar solo)

Stupid bastard! Stupid bastard! Stupid bastard girl!
You are such a stupid bastard! You I want to kill!
Burn my house to the ground! All doped up on pills!
You are such a stupid bastard! Stupid bastard girl!

(Fast Hurricane power organ solo)

Stupid bastard! Stupid bastard! Stupid Bastard Girl!
Perhaps I'll grab my baseball bat and use my baseball skills.
Pretend your stupid head's the ball and swing with all my might!
Home run with your skull tonight stupid bastard girl!

Ohhhh stupid bastard giiiirrrrlllllll!
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
(cold ending)

Sven Killer Robot Spacema
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Postby Sven Killer Robot Spacema » Fri May 11, 2007 8:50 pm

The Four Green Hill Climbin' Lads "The Garden Gate"

Well me Uncle Mike and me cousin Kate down by the garden gate
They're drinkin' Irish whiskey and they're goin' on a date
Just thinkin' 'bout the whole thing makes me want to masterbate
They're ain't a lass in Dublin half as hot as cousin Kate!

Nicolson
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Postby Nicolson » Fri May 11, 2007 8:56 pm

Rolling Stone reads some of the worst lyrics ever:

http://www.rollingstone.com/rockdaily/i ... rics-ever/

(and oddly enough, the funniest thing about it is his pronounciation of "Shana" Twain.)

Chris G
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Postby Chris G » Sat May 12, 2007 12:12 am

.



On that Rolling Stone board, several people mention Starship - We Built This City. That's pretty bad.

What about...


AND IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII.....
WILL AAALLLWAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYSS LUV YOOOOUUUUUUUU....




.

worpswede
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Postby worpswede » Sun May 13, 2007 9:02 pm

Chris G wrote:
What about...
AND IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII.....
WILL AAALLLWAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYSS LUV YOOOOUUUUUUUU....

Overplayed? Absolutely. Whitney's version a tad showy? Perhaps. But I'm standing by Dolly and would suggest that she's quite an awesome lyricist. Even the aforementioned song is pretty heartfelt:

"I hope life treats you kind
And I hope you have all you've dreamed of
And I wish you joy and happiness
But above all this I wish you love"

For you, Chris, I give you a sample from our mutually admired and respected Doug Fieger:

"He's on my back
He's on my back
Piss on my back
Kill it for me
He's making me strange
The monkey and me"
-"Siamese Twins (The Monkey & Me)"
from Get The Knack

Chris G
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Postby Chris G » Mon May 14, 2007 2:18 am

Touch showy?

No, more painful than fingernails on a chalkboard... the sound of that song makes me want to smash up the speakers and throw the stereo through the window (somebody elses speakers and stereo... through somebody else's window).

But you're correct, in that it is mostly the delivery. I do have respect for Dolly, but I'd hardly consider it her greatest lyrical masterpiece, either.


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