Platinum Record and Dove Awards, wherein our hero discovers what audio the RIAA actually presses onto the platinum records they give out. Via Kempa.
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That's funny as hell. I think that one of my fave "gold record" stories is recounted in Robert Gordon's excellent It Came From Memphis book, where someone knew Alex Chilton circa Big Star. Chilton was living at home at this point, and had a gold record for one of the Box Tops' singles hanging on the wall. The label had fallen off the record, which, the person telling the story felt, kinda reflected the state of life that Chilton was in at that time. No word was mentioned on what music Alex's gold record contained.